Ever been told a little something something about a huge thing called love? Have you ever felt as if you were on top of the world just by closing your eyes and wishing, just upon that little hope that that pretty person is holding your puny hands, grabbing it, and at that same time, your feet tickles and your whole body starts tingling and tiny things your never thought you possessed starts shaking like you've just been inserted into an electrical socket. Ever lingered on someone's eyes and felt that that gaze exchanged, even if it was just a millisecond, elevated your mood. Ever noticed every single thing about a person? Ever noticed how his hands were the most beautiful thing on Earth, how you would never considered the swirls and wrinkles of someone's palm simply lovely? Ever caught yourself waking up and seeing an image of them painted in your mind? Ever wishing you were in his arms? dreaming of kissing him on his pink, chipped at the corners of his rather dried mouth. At that point of exchanging saliva, you felt like your emotions was a fusion of happiness intertwined with deep sorrow.
Ecstatic that you've found such bliss, such pure happiness. It's like when some hero have saved your day, like when you see an A in your report card, like when you see the last slice of pizza with a card written beside it saying, "For you," with your name beside it, like finding your phone in your own house when you need an emergency, like eating ice-cream right after a movie-marathon of your favourite movies, like still landing on the ground safely right after a horrifying roller coaster ride that thought would have killed you for sure, like when your mum kisses you goodnight and tucks you in bed and embraces you while whispering 'I love you' ever so softly in your ear, hoping you wouldn't listen and also like looking up to the sky and smiling while the sunrise greets you at your doorstep. It's this indescribable feeling that makes your day seem just a lot brighter. This feeling that adds life to you know, Life itself. The feeling of sheer exuberance that such treasure is found. And at the back of your head, your brain is coming up with a word to coincide with this feeling that you have allowed to flow in you. And this word that bears infinite meaning conjures; love.
In that one kiss, all these images of happy moments fill your weary mind vanishing every bit and pieces of fatigue, like you've just woke up with a message from your crush wishing you a good morning. And in that one kiss, you feel sad. Sad, at the horrid possibilities that the "love" is going to fade away. The possibility that forever would end someday, somehow. the possibility of the love, dying even after you've put so much of yourself into it. The possibility of losing that one person whom you've created an imaginary future with. Planning your little wedding; the where, what, who, why and how. Depressed that this blissful happiness would meet the harsh reality that anything can happen. As Murphy's law states, "Anything that can go wrong will go wrong." Hoping, wishing with all your might that your love's going to defy the impossible and stay strong.
In that one whole second, your mind goes blank. Your heart stops beating. You think of all these disasters that you may encounter and then you fall. You fall. Fall so hard that only the one you fall apart for can fix you up.
But they just leave you. They'll leave you with broken promises that they don't really mind breaking. Kicking you aside. Acting as if you never was there. hoping you would stay out of his life. and then he'll just give you the cold shoulder. All the forever ends and all the love crushed.
Ever felt there was never a forever? I love hating the hatred I bear of love.