Starvation is destroying the paper-thin walls of my stomach, like acid on bare skin. The fluid that was extracted from my body has caused a riot in my stomach. And emptiness has barbed it with skinny splinters of pain forcing me to gorge down a human being, if possible (Must be certified halal though). How could my organs betray me? For goodness sake, I fucking fed them since the day I was born, gah. I search night and day satisfying them, but.. sigh. Look at them, they don't even want to look me in the eyes. Oh the agony, unbearable, really. When I talk to them only silent awkwardness replies by eliminating H20 from my eyes. Sometimes I forget that they've grown up so fast, Kids sigh kids. sigh. kids. stop. kids. Did I just call my stomach a kid? Doesn't it make sense? No. well, ice cream melts. Did you know that? Cause I do. Doesn't it make sense? No it doesn't. See now it's a game. Well 'cept no one's playing. But then again who cares? Oh just so you know, i mean, no offense, IN CASE (like an emergency first aid box kinda thing)(ha, I know this doesn't contain any sense but well Michael Jackson died, so nothing else makes sense in the world now)(Did you know that I'm just writing in brackets just as a secret tool to lengthen this, I mean long post do look enticing)(okay fine I know it doesn't, but everybody can dream can't they)(Oh did I tell you about my Michael Jackson dream?!)(ha, of course I did)(I would want to elaborate on the dream but nah, it's not worth the brackets)you didn't know, you're reading this, all of this, so I guess you care? Well, slap yourself if you do. three times. God, I am so fierce. (silence) Just smile and wave boys, just smile and wave. ha.
So (dam dam daaaaaaaa dam), I am here DAM to tell you DAMDAM that I am DAM, okay not dumb. I am here blogging. Taking the first step to the path of righteousness. Ya I know what you're thinking, just keep on reading, asshole. Aren't you going to punch me because I just called you an a-hole? Imma give you five seconds to do that. Too late. All overdued punches should be sent to punchmeinthefacejustbecauseisaidso@gooddog.cum Do be aware that your generosity would be repaid. All proceeds would go to your mother's house. Thinking about punching me again? Think again mister. Don't let me call my penguins. Wait, I don't have penguins. Oh wait, worse, I don't have a phone now. Oh well, you don't know that, right. so yeah, oooooooo paaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaang-gwiiiiiiiiinz.
Okay stop it.
Stopped.
Can't stop me, lalalalalala. (annoying orange accent)
It's been two years since I had this blog, I would have a two-year anniversary but sadly, I'm married to facebook, it's stated. Go visit my facebook. Search myra ruins. The first ugly profile you see is mine. Or not. Throw a die. It helps. Ha, just messing with you. whoever you are. Ha. spooooky. Nah. it's not spooky. spook-key. Kay, finish already lah. done, I penis lah. Okay stop it. shutting down in t-minus 5 seconds. 5. 4. 3. 2. 10. 9. 8. 7. 6. 5. 4. 3. 2. 10.
Okay. Hmmmmmmmm.
Lets play a game. Yes? Well you're going to have to, because you must read it till the end, and I'll give you a punch. fruit punch. (HAHHAHAHHA) wow. I am so fucking lame, I think I have to go to rehab, noo noo nooooooo yes I've been black but when I come back I, moo moo moo. ha. Kay, diam. Seeerious (says it in Alvin's mat accent).
I'll just randomly type words/phrases/quotes that would hopefully cover up everything I've missed, so here goes. in t-minus 5 seconds. come on count with me (dora's accent) Louder... I can't hear you. I swear even as a child I was devising a deliberate plan to kill Dora the Explorer. There should be a facebook group for that. My husband, Facebook, told me there's practically a facebook group about almost anything, one goes like this: (or somewhere along this line) being bored is boring because boredom is.. okay memory still sucks. peanuts.
Ok, like I said before, here goes:
Friends. Bestfriend. Bestfriends (?). Boyfriends. Heartbreak. Heartache. Stomach ache. Headache. Breaks. Kit kat. Love. Lust. Lost Infatuations. Fights. Tears. Endless. Selfish. Sell fish. Something fishy. Underwater World. Glue. YEllow. Sun. Hot. Warm. Sweat. Breath against breath. Sex (well not me, just heard A MILLION real life stories about it). Family. Screams. Pain. Physical. Verbal. Abuse. Silence. Agony. Dead. Alive. Life. Ruining. Running. Colliding. DEciding. Hey, soul sister, Identical, Different, difference, indifference, geometry, square one, relationships, friendships, students, teachers, Mothers, cows, problems, police, cases, praying, blood tests, hope, we are the world, jamaican, weird, Hard, black hole, High, low, blue, red, fury, sweet, nothing, blank, filled, empty, full, shit, food, variety, choices, heart-rending, swaying, yes, no, never, forever, train rides, holding hands, letting go, promises, caprices, holding on, fading away, Riding, jumping, sliding, swinging, monkey, me, you, leaves, plants, Lovely, book, stories, reality, illusion, funny, green room, acoustics, echo, distractions, bgr, report card, reflection, mirrors, supernatural, wondering, eyes closed, imagination, stars, vanilla twilight, owl, hoots, beat boxing, punching, slapping, crying, hurting, death, self-absorbed, image, value, importance, priorities, cool, being cool, trying to be cool, who's cool, originality, fatality, is it reality?, distance, shivering, cold, attitude, shouting, teary-eyed, cingested breathing, breaking into a million pieces, begging, smiling, laughing, laughter, funny, fun, different fun, experiments, assumptions, calculations, expectations, not meeting requirements, disappointment, embarrassment, eyes, ice, blasting, balls, hair, bald, cute, weird, nice?, gossips, back-stabbing, trust, issues, repeating, mistakes, contemplating, the end, the beginning, the fallen, the rise, rice, poverty, finance, accountancy, future, blank canvas, art, stupid, suicidal, pressure, boiling, chemical reaction, unstable equilibrium, falling, falling in love, gravity, pull, push, existence, absence, extinction, revolution, higher level, revolving, same matter, memory, the past, mute, screaming, music, crescendo, rain, thunderstorm, kissing, lightning, chemistry, biology, body, shapes, shape-shifting, misfitting, fit, missing pieces of the puzzle, lost pieces, found, reunite, alone, surrounded, crowded, losers, together, far away, congratulations, awards, complacency, laziness, complaints, nagging, sick, sickness, sickening, sickos, seek, help, helpline, counseling, rehab, Amy winehouse, alcohol, Absolut, vodka, Inglorious basterds, Hitler, ruler, Respect, respected, disgusted, blood, defiance, rebellious, vampires, Remember me, I love you. To death do us part. Vows, do we keep them or just alienate them to show we're independent. Are we sane?
I'm in love. With you. Together. Apart. A fart. Goodbye, and enjoy the sweet holidays.
p.s/ I lost my ipod touch. If you happen to see any ipod touch, even in passing shops, it's mine. please return as soon as possible. I love you.