Depression got the better of me.
I know it's exceptionally hard when you're trying to forget someone you claim to love.
I understand.
But i didn't mean to.
I really did like you.
and i swear those feelings were pure and true.
For I wish i can still say I love you.
But as much as i want to pursue the feelings,
I can't.
i'm just so fucking helpless now.
I tried,
oh trust me i tried.
I didn't know destiny would play a game on me,
no clue whatsoever.
I'm sorry.
But however i apologise,
I still cannot beat the agony you're feeling now.
FUCKFUCKFUCK.
I'm so dumb.
I'm just so fucked up,
I can't even cry.
there's approximately one million things circling in my head.
But the more i think about it, the more i can't get my head around them.
i know i don't make sense.
but that's how i feel.
WHY CAN'T I JUST CRY MY HEART OUT
SO I WON'T BEAR WITH THIS ANYMORE?
all this mixed emotions are beyond comprehension really. I hate this.
But whatever uh, i'm still going to face it.
I'm not going to run anymore. Destiny's got me twisted and now karma's caught me by my hand.
I can't run and i won't.
So i'm gna face it.
clear all this hit that's fogging up the glass of my life.
Now that i realized what i've done
I'm going to work to get my sins cleared.
and now i'm flushed with all the emotions you can name.
I brought it upon myself.
I know.
I am to blame.
I should be blame.
For i kept you in the dark and hid the truth from you.
I'm sorry,
that's all i want to say to you.
I'm going to mend my ways and say goodbye
coz if that's what's best
then i'm here to say.
Goodbye.
Let me vanish from your eyes
hopefully,
this disappearing act banish your misery inside,
I love you.
I just don't want you to breakdown.
As soon as these words penetrate in you,
a mental picture of me will appear.
and it will just remain as that.
nothing more, nothing less.
It's okay.
Let the agony flow in me.
Let me get hurt.
I'm fine with it.
I still love you and
I'm sorry, really.